As salamu alaikum.
My name is Amanda and this is my husband Esa. I’m Palestinian and my husband is African American and we’re both born and raised Muslims.
Growing up, my father always put religion before culture. Don’t get me wrong, my dad is very Arab (lol) but he never allowed his culture to come before his religion. My father always told me “You can’t compromise dean for this or that. You can’t compromise dean for anything.” In this case, he told me “you can’t compromise dean for race or skin color.” and he was referring to marriage.
I’ve gotten asked “What was your dads initial reaction?” And “Was it hard convincing your dad to say yes to him?” My dads initial reaction? My dad loved him from the very start. When my dad first told me Esa asked for me, he never mentioned he was African American. Why? Because that doesn’t matter. It’s never mattered to my father. My dad looked at it from the Islamic perspective and realized this man was great for me. Was it hard convincing him? There was no need.
You can not preach “One Ummah” at the masjids or your MSA events but when someone is interested you turn him/her down because of where they’re from. One Ummah includes every single race, nationality, every single Muslim in every single county.
Here’s a reminder from the Quran. :) “O mankind, indeed We have created you from male and female and made you peoples and tribes that you may know one another. Indeed, the most noble of you in the sight of Allah is the most righteous of you. Indeed, Allah is Knowing and Acquainted. [Quran 49:13]
It is not your color or ethnicity that matters, it is your taqwa. :) Bilal RA, he went from a slave to one of the most trusted and loyal companions to the Prophet PBUH. He was also the first Muaddhin in Islam.. He was Ethiopian. :)
Please don’t confuse religion with culture. Be open minded. Marriage is a beautiful thing. I pray that anyone who is looking or wanting to get married are blessed with the very best spouse.